I am currently in Eau Claire, Wisconsin in a waiting and preparation season. I was living in Kansas City, MO for about 4 months or so being a part of the IHOP (International House of PRAYER) and the community, when I felt the Lord tug on my heart and have me move back and go back to Bethel University, where I was going last year. I went to Kansas City/IHOP saying it was God's plan and that he told me to go, but really the motives of my heart were to do what I wanted, to get trained by God in the way I wanted to. It doesn't take very long before God shows you it doesn't work that way. Yes, I was going there to seek God. I really was! but that was not where I was called to in this point in my life, although God really blessed me there and taught me a ton of things. But the thing God revealed to me was that I didn't want to be in a great place, part of a great ministry, which is truly blessed, but that I want to be in the place He has for me because that is where he will move in my life the most. I love IHOP and they are a very blessed place and they have and still are impacting my life.
Something else He taught me at IHOP was that no matter what choice we make (because God does let us make choices) He will never leave us and will use those choices for His and our good because he loves us that much. He will eventually turn us back around into the right direction if we are willing to listen to Him and be obedient. Him turning me around back in the right direction is Him showing me that he really does care for me and the plan He has for my life! I think it took me going to Kansas City/IHOP to really appreciate where God wants me to be. Because now I am more excited because I am confident that Jesus will reveal to me his heart and use me even more, where he has called me to be. Maybe, if I wouldn't have gone to IHOP, this wouldn't have happened and I would have longed to still go to IHOP where I am not supposed be right now. I would have still been confused.
Last year, I was really excited and confident going to Bethel because I know without a doubt he told me to go there to prepare me to be a missionary. I was pumped and was ready for the promises God gave me. He blessed me with some awesome brothers and sisters in Christ. We spent a lot of time there praying and worshiping together and seeking God's will for our lives and where He wanted the campus to go. It was great and it encouraged me so much. I felt more a live there and God was moving in me so much. But then I got somewhat distracted wishing I was in a different place. I heard the IHOP message and wanted to live that life, so I decided to go there instead of Bethel the following year. But God turned me around and said, "you don't have to be at IHOP in Kansas City to live that message. You can be at Bethel where I have called you and live that same message. You can use that message where you are." I think sometimes we get so excited sometimes about different ministries and places, that we want to go do everything we see that is good, but completely forget about the place God has prepared for us and called us to. That's how I am anyways. But those different ministries and movements and teachings can be a part of anywhere. They are there to help us where God has called us. It's not about the place but about God. God is not just over their, but here as well because He lives in us and will never leave us. So, now I'm ready to be at Bethel University in St. Paul, MN and get trained the way the Lord wants to train me. I'm excited and can't wait to see what the Holy Spirit reveals to me and does through me!
I mentioned earlier that I am in a waiting and preparation season. This is because I am living at home in Eau Claire, WI waiting for Bethel University to get clear up everything so I can be enrolled again their. I am shooting for this spring semester, Lord willing and could use some prayers about the process. Although I am waiting to go back to Bethel, Jesus has been preparing my heart hear the place I will always called home. He setting me free of somethings that have always gotten in the way of my relationship with Him and what He has been wanting to do in my life. It's refreshing because I have all the time in the world to be in worship, prayer, and to study God's word. Although sometimes I get board because I have a lot of free time but I am thankful for this pause before school again. It's a great opportunity to sit still and hear the Lords voice about what He is doing and wants to do in my heart and the people around me.
All glory to Jesus Christ, my Savior and King!
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